I can't believe I would ever be wheelchair shopping

A few months ago, when walking/standing got to be unbearable/ very limited, I reluctantly (and I mean that...it took me a while through tears to talk to my mom about a wheelchair) went to my (very narrow minded) rheumatologist about how painful it is to walk and stand. It takes me a bit to cry in front of people, doctors included, but she brought me to tears. She turned it around on me and made it seem like I was giving up and that it would make things worse by relying on it? I understand it to a point, but I. Am. Miserable. 

She then brushed me off and shoved me on my way with a RX for vicodin. (I have never taken narcotics before and stressed through tears that I did not want them.) I begged for her help and she denied me of any compassion or assistance. SHE gave up. I did not. I am beginning a new journey and if I'm ever going to make it out alive and healthy, I need to be able to get out of my house and bed. Not for fun. For the necessities. Appointments, grocery shopping, and getting the mail. WOOT!

This won't be permanent for me, I'm determined to that. But sometimes we all need a little help, right? (Even if for some reason it is long-term or permanent, that wouldn't be so bad. I could do more than I can right now, and at least I'd be able to gain some sort of independence!) Anyone seen the Sundance series called Push Girls? I highly recommend it for a glimpse into a wheeled life. It's on Netflix, and has completely changed the way I view wheeled individuals. 

My QUESTION to you is do you use a chair, and/or can you recommend a fairly inexpensive, reliable, comfortable (and possibly cute? I'm in my 20s, and would rather try to get some enjoyment out of life's little obstacles-or I can decorate it.) chair that I can purchase online? I am a frequent Amazonian and have been browsing, but I feel I need to just. do. it. And soon. 

If you were able to read this, I thank you and applaud you. I sincerely hope you can't give me any advice because I hope you aren't in this situation. But I thought I'd ask! 

Take care of yourselves! =)

*Sensitive Subject*

I will not be “participating in Christmas”. I believe in sharing love year-round, sans presents.

I would much prefer to share small acts of random kindness with strangers who might feel so inclined to do the same for others.

In order for me to be able to interact with live people, it is essential to be able to leave the house/bed/recliner. After months of dreading, and toying with the idea…
I am, however, asking Santa for a wheelchair…or the ability to not need one. Or a new body, whichever comes first. ;) Aside from horrible, unbearable joint and muscle pain causing waxing and waning mobility issues, standing is proving to be quite difficult without nearly passing out. I’ve got plenty of issues, and I am working on them, but it proves to be quite difficult from the inside of my home. I don’t want to be “that girl” but I will be, if it helps me to regain some sort of independence and normalcy to the life that I yearn to live!

I ask not, for your pity, sympathy, or judgement, but your love, understanding, and support. –Not only for myself, but for others who may be in similar situations who may not *look* sick. Our bodies are a strange and wonderful thing that we may never fully understand, but until then, let us love them anyway –despite so-called flaws. =)

Peace, Love, and Veggies to you all this very merry holiday season!

Starting a new journey! Wanna join?

Things have been pretty up in the air as of recent. A lot has happened, yet also a lot of nothing has happened. I feel as though my life is flying by me, while I'm standing painfully still.

My little brain has been dedicated to research and development for the past few years. (Of my body.)

I can't believe it's almost 2 years since I moved to California. That boggles my ever living soul. We are nearing our 2nd lump of holidays "on our own". Things have been far from easy, and are only going to get more difficult within the next month or so.

In a month from now I will have seen an LLMD (Lyme Literate MD) who can hopefully help put together the pieces of the crazy puzzle that is my life.

I have suspected Lyme Disease ever since I noticed a bullseye rash on my wrist in the fall of 2009. I was disregarded, brushed aside and left on my own to wither away. And I did. For a few years, until I decided to take things into my own hands.

I decided I had to step up and become my own health advocate. Since no one else could, or would. Starting with the "simple" act of eating. I'm now consciously aware of what goes into my mouth and how it will affect me, positively or negatively. I adjust accordingly. When that didn't "work", I began digging a bit deeper. The wheels were spinning and with lack of improvement, sometimes comes the ability to slow down and look back. To reconsider possibilities, and to slowly put pieces together.

Lyme Disease is one of those things you hear about and think, "well...that couldn't be me" and you go on with your life. Until you take a turn for the worse.

Most people know the "basics" of Lyme Disease, that it is something you "catch" from a tick, and is usually spread by deer in "deeply wooded areas". While that is semi-true, it is not the whole truth. Lyme Disease is the single most complex ailment I have yet to come across in my Research and Development stage.

The more I learn about Lyme Disease, the more I am flabbergasted by; not only the absolute ignorance of the layperson, but doctors as well, and the lack of credibility in our medical communities. Almost to the point that one might begin to think "They" (The Almighty, Narrow-minded They) want people to remain sick, suffering, miserable human beings, because They fail to remove their heads from their rear ends long enough to listen to people who care. People who want to make a difference, by adjusting their minds to consider all of the possibilities.

There *is* treatment available. Lots of options, all of which are much more complex than the typical "21 days of doxy, and you're good to go!" This is a raging misconception, and we must ALL be educated. Starting with healthy people. http://lymedisease.org/ is a good place to start!

I'm hoping I won't have to try them all, but at least I'm reassured I won't run out of treatment options because I won't stop fighting. Which is why I am planning on documenting my Lyme Journey. Not only for others, but also so I know where I'm at. I can look back and see how bad I was at certain times and also to track progress! *Fingers crossed!* I have a feeling video updates might be coming sometime soon, as my brain is just not that into the whole computer and typing while looking at the blinding screen thing.

So, bare with me here. I'm sure someone will read this......someday. And that's all that matters, if even only myself in the future. =)