The Best Muffins

When it comes to muffins, I tend to think that I can't possibly screw them up! But, I'm going for perfection, here. This is batch #3? Within the last week and by far the best! The others were good, but were just not up to my muffin standards. (I ate them anyway, obviously!)

So, I went back to the muffin board, and got my creative juices flowing...I was hungry, and needed sustenance. And fast! I threw a bunch of stuff in the bowls and into the oven, and this is roughly what I came up with! Anyone care to trial these for me?

FYI:

T=Tablespoon

t=teaspoon 

*Table is bigger than tea ;)

Preheat oven to 350°F, make sure your rack is in the middle of the oven- it's easier to move when cool.

In 1 medium-large mixing bowl, combine and mash with fork: (no mixers/blenders, etc are used in the making of muffins!)

2 bananas frozen/thawed mushed

2 cups? Cooked Pumpkin (Thawed)- I have a bunch already cut and cooked in the freezer from my Halloween pumpkin massacre.

**4oz? Unsweetened, all natural Applesauce (1 tiny tub)

**2t Chia gel (I usually have a jar in the fridge of pre-soaked chias gelling for future culinary use)

1/2t Vanilla extract (I've tried it without, but it's better with.)

**1 1/2T Vinegar (*big T!) (add to bowl last)

In 2nd medium sized bowl, combine:

1 3/4c all purpose Gluten Free baking flour. (I used Bob's Red Mill-and boy, I didn't realize how pricey this stuff was! I used to bake a lot, gluten-style. But GF baking is semi-new to me.)

1/4 - 1/2c Brown sugar (Can absolutely sub for your fav sugar/sweetener. I've been meaning to buy maple, but I just don't know which kind to buy, and I don't bake or use sweeteners (sugar) very often.)

1T Raw sugar -Turbinado (Same as above, your preference- it's what I had on hand.)

1T Baking Soda

1t Baking Powder

1/8t Salt

2t Cinnamon

Dump dry ingredients into wet ingredient bowl, and lightly combine with fork just until moist. Too much stirring can cause TMF. (Total Muffin Failure.)

Fork into muffin pans, (batter should be forkably thick- do not want runny muffins!) I don't use paper muffin liners‎, because they seem to come out of the pan just fine without. GO GREEN!

Makes 18 small/med sized muffins.

Bake at 350°F on middle preheated oven rack for 15-20 min until browned on top. Middle may still be a bit moist-That's OK because we didn't use any eggs! 

Best when cooled! You may not think they're cooked all the way, but once they're cooled, they are! 

**Secret ingredients. These are pretty much necessary to substitute for the Almighty Egg. They're a secret because people will not believe ‎they're inside! You can't even taste them. =D But, you'll know, and you can giggle when your friends/relatives exclaim with delight how fantastic these VEGAN GLUTEN FREE BANANA PUMPKIN SPICE MUFFINS are!


P.S. The stumps are just as delicious as the muffin tops! 

This, that, and my life as a car

Today was the day. December 18. 2013. The day my life was going to change. Or so I thought. I've had an appointment scheduled with a LLMD for about 4 months now. 

This led to that, and complications with insurance, and delays with current doctors, loose ends needing tied up- all of this forced me to have to wait to see the specialist. A moment I have been dreaming about, yes, seriously, for probably about my whole life.

‎The way I think of it is this: I've waited this long for answers, I can absolutely survive another month. Who knows, there might be someone who needed this appointment more than I do, and it might just be their Holiday miracle. It also gives me more time to detox my poor lil ol' body. 

Since I can remember, I have always had something wrong with my body. I was always sick. Something *always* hurt. It wasn't always the same thing, almost like my body was on rotation, which was almost somehow worse. Having to explain that while, yesterday I could not use my right wrist at all, today, however it is my left wrist that is unbearably painful. Swap out "wrist" with any imaginable body part, and on a daily basis, this is how the story goes. 

Pain is really only a part of my problems. ‎I am afflicted with a terrible brain, that supposedly checks out just fine. Wanna hear a little secret? Well, the things that are often unseen are sometimes the most fun, and ironically, present the most problems. *ahem*

My autonomic nervous system (the thermostat of the body, that controls every body function that you're unaware of) is WHACKED.

Imagine, if you will, a vehicle that is stuck in 1st gear while going up a steep incline. You let off the accelerator, while simultaneously feathering the clutch, but something is not right. Something is out of sync and you stall out. You start to roll backwards at an incredibly frightening speed. You start to panic, your heart is pounding out of your chest, while racing at speeds faster than your body is going. You're quickly losing altitude, and gaining even more speed, but in the wrong direction! You start sweating. Nausea kicks in at the most inopportune moment. You think, well, "I'll just hit the accelerator even more..that'll help!" It doesn't. It makes it worse. You're already past the point of rescue. So. You slam on the brakes. It's the only option until you'll eventually and inevitably crash and burn. Then, you have to begin again. Very, very slowly. Even slower than you had begun the last time, because your engine is damaged and you must take care of it until it's on the mend. In 1st gear, again, you try to climb the mountain that is life. Eventually, you may make it to the top of an incline, a plateau, where you're unable to continue ahead, less you free-fall into the abyss. This. This, is your time to acknowledge how far you've come. To assess the damages. To appreciate what is around you. Take it all in, for you do not know if you will make it up the next climb. Take the necessary rest, and prepare for the next part of the journey of Operation: Road to Recovery. 

I never thought I would be the Stinky Girl

‎‎Ok guys. I am disgustingly drenched in the pungent aroma of Eau de Garlique. It is equally embarrassing and nauseatingly gross. 

Fortunately, my chronic life doesn't require (or provide me with) much social interaction.

Also, on the not so horrible side, Mom loves garlic, and says she doesn't mind the smell. However, I cannot get over it. I reek. Imagine old school cartoons with the overly dramatic stench lines. Yup. That's me! The Stinky Girl. It's not your typical "BO", it is flat out Garlic, and a lot of it. (Despite forcing myself to shower/bathe every night!)

But, you know what I have to say to that? Oh well. I'm doing what's good for my body, and that's all that matters. I gotta do something proactive, rather than nothing!

Garlic is a natural antiseptic and antibiotic. It helps to cleanse and detox the nasties from inside. (Plus many more benefits.) Along with consuming at least one clove of garlic every day (gotta work the way up to more),‎ I drink warm lemon water immediately after waking, and throughout the day. I also do Alka-Seltzer Gold (with a bit of lemon juice) usually once a day in the evening. 

I am not following any protocol, and am currently not under the care of a supervision, but these are the most common mild, seemingly safe detox approaches I have researched. 

Along with the garlic, lemon, and Alka-Seltzer GOLD (only kind that is recommended), I alternate days with either a FIR Sauna (then shower), or Epsom salt bath. 

Theoretically, I should be detoxing like a mo-fo, but alas, I still feel shittay! I'm not saying it‎'s not helping, but I know I need to do more. Theoretically, what I imagine is happening inside my body is this:

I'm doing my darndest to detox, detox, detox, and I might be getting rid of toxins and bad bugs, but logically doesn't it seem like I am just making room for more bugs? I'm pretty sure that's how it works. 

So, I am more than anxious/excited to get started with some sort of treatment right away. 

The flipside, I could *not* be detoxing, and the bugs will somehow find a way to continue to spread, etc. So, I am confident that I am doing more good than harm at this point. I will continue to detox to the best of my body's ability, until mid-late January when I see the LLMD for my first appointment! (FINALLY!)